i am not promoting this, it is how i cope, this is what my life has come to, it doesn't have to be the same for you.

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wow like i really want him. he put his arms around me today. we are great friends. but i want more. maybe he wants more..

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i watched that video of people kissing for the first time. i remembered my first kisses with important people. my first kiss, where it felt like there were fireworks. a kiss with someone i had been wanting to kiss for a long time, that feeling when it finally happened. sitting on the beach, having someone say i really want to kiss you, then letting it happen even when it shouldn’t have. kissing is great. it needs to happen more often. 

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i met an amazing person today. a person who doesn’t come around very often. he is full of light. he is the sort of person i want to know more about. so much more. he is intriguing. 

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my hobbies include eating and complaining that i’m getting fat

(via hollow-soldier)

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I crave intimacy but I get confused and uncomfortable when I’m shown even the slightest bit of attention or affection.

(Source: kanbaewest, via crazed-for-skinnbones)

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just because i hate me doesnt mean you can

(via torturemybody)

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so you message me last night while we were both drunk saying you want to start things over again, you said you would message me today. no message. do i have to give up on you like i did last time?

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one month until i go back to school… i want to lose 35lb. it can be done. i can try.

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working with my ex… he says ‘so are you working friday?’ and i reply yes. then he turns around and says oh i wasn’t talking to you, instead he was flirting with some blonde over the counter. i couldn’t speak for another 20 minutes. way to pump up my anxiety asshole. 

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so today, i saw the guy i like at his work. i pretended that i didn’t see him, and walked with confidence past him hoping he would notice me. when i got home, i realized my dress was see through and you could see my heart underwear. yeah i hope he didn’t notice me.. but he probably did. good way to fuck things up even more.